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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in vicchao's LiveJournal:

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    Monday, August 21st, 2006
    10:01 pm
    VIC'S BLOG HAS MOVED TO MYSPACE!!!
    hey folks--

    just a reminder because my friend has informed me that her friends have expressed disappointment with the sparseness of my blog:

    I am now blogging on myspace. if you want to read it, it's at
    http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.ListAll&friendID=7062795&MyToken=fdbf6919-7562-44e6-b2f9-63c390ebdf9eML


    and you don't have to be registered on it or be my friend to read it. it's open to the public (i added this part in response to nikki's comment).

    thank you for your interest. i'm still astounded that anybody not named "vic chao" gives a hoot about my blog, but i ain't gonna complain about it. it's flattering.
    Wednesday, July 12th, 2006
    12:03 am
    vic moves his blog to the darkside (aka myspace)
    yes, i've started to blog on myspace, aka "whorespace." don't have enough time to go into why i made the switch, and why i haven't blogged for a gajillion years, and why i started up again. will do that later, although the summary is that i've been feeling a lot better and just have been busy doing other things than blogging. but if you want to read my new blog drivel, you can go to http://myspace.com/vicchao

    if you've been reading my livejournal blog, most of these new myspace blogs are old hat (blah blah blah depressed blah blah blah pain blah blah blah sad, etc.). but that's just to give myself a starting point. i'm sure i'll be cranking out new crap soon enough.

    gonna try to blog regularly again. whoopie.

    vic
    Sunday, March 26th, 2006
    4:16 pm
    i hate engineering
    but i gotta admire good engineering.

    i'm convinced that some of the most brilliant design engineers work for ikea. the way they're able to make a full-blown desk/shelf unit/tv center/combination recliner sofabed fit into a small flat box is really really impressive.

    the best molding engineers work for lego. seriously. they need the most precise, best controlled tolerances on their products in order to minimize the occasional "stuck lego" syndrome which is inevitably followed by the "oral separation method" which invariably leaves bite marks on the legos and sore teeth.
    Saturday, March 25th, 2006
    5:03 pm
    social myopia
    coined a phrase the other day when thinking about (and observing) the behavior of people that aren't deliberately rude, but rather just a little too self-absorbed to be aware of standards of consideration that need to be followed for the good of those around them. and i realized that "socially myopic" was a good way to put it. i like that phrase. social myopia. go me.
    Thursday, March 23rd, 2006
    1:57 am
    pseudoephedrine hcl vs diphenhydramine hcl
    in a classic example of Spending Good Money After Bad, or One Stupid Turn Deserves Another, or Blind Leading The Moronic, or just plain Vic is dumb, i decided to take a coupla benadryl (diphenhydramine hcl) to try to make me sleepy to counter the stimulant effects of the pseudoephedrine hcl that is in the tylenol cold. i guess the two are trying to battle it out in my system. only wish i could exaggerate this battle by taking meth + valium or something like that. that'd be fun.

    so far i haven't noticed much. i'm still wide awake. and instead of having a stuffed nose, it's running.

    that's about it.

    come on benadryl. i need some sleep.
    1:07 am
    where have all the bullies gone?
    i'm open about the fact that growing up, i was pretty much the shortest, smallest, smartest, and only asian kid in school, and how tolerant and receptive and full of love children are towards people who are different and smaller than them, and how they embraced me, if the word "embraced" can be construed to mean, "whomped on."

    so here's something that i've noticed--if i happen to mention to somebody my childhood experiences being picked on, they invariably say something like, "oh yeah, me too. i was totally the guy/girl who got picked on when i was young." nobody in the history of my life has ever said, "oh yeah, i was the guy who was always picking on people like you." even the 6'9" former basketball player in europe agreed that he was always the small guy who got picked on.

    come on people, somebody's fucking lying here. how could you have been the one getting picked on all the time when i was so clearly the one getting picked on all the time? maybe it's that people don't remember their childhoods very well so on those occasional days when they got made fun of (like the Day After Your Haircut, The Day You Wore A Baseball Cap To School And Had Kids Throw It Around While You Tried To Get It Back, The Day After You Tried To Ask Out Jennifer Schoenbrod), they think that they were The Kid Who Got Picked On because they had a day when they got picked on. They don't realize however, that for The Real Kids Who Got Picked On, those days are called "weekdays."

    so anyway, i theorize that it's maybe just kind of trendy to say that you were the one who got picked on. maybe it gives the impression of depth and makes you an object of sympathy and compassion to say that you suffered as a child. and maybe it also would make you look like a total asshole if you said, "yeah, i was the guy who always called kids racial slurs and tried to humiliate them in every way possible in school."

    so instead, everybody, even the former bullies, go around pretending to be the ones who got picked on.

    the other possibility is that the circles that i hang out in are the ones that draw the losers. certainly, the cool kids weren't standing in line to become engineers. and of course, people become actors out of a secret insecurity and belief that they would be better liked if they were just something more than themselves.

    maybe the bullies all went into other professions where they could use their position to indulge in their love of dominating and abusing other people. like policemen, prison guards, meter maids, tow truck drivers, and bouncers.


    and President Of The United States.





    has the tylenol non-drowsy formula worn off yet?

    nope.

    still gonna be a long night. btw, tylenol spelled backwards is "lonely T"
    1:04 am
    Tylenol PM vs Tylenol Cold Non-Drowsy Formula
    funny how when you get distracted on the phone, you can try to take some Tylenol PM but wind up taking Tylenol Cold Non-Drowsy Formula instead.


    gonna be a long fuckin' night.
    Sunday, March 19th, 2006
    11:51 pm
    Mad Cowgirl LA debut at Silver Lake Film Festival 3/24 & 3/27
    kinda cool--my movie Mad Cowgirl has its LA debut at the Silver Lake Film Festival on 3/24 and 3/27.

    related websites:
    http://madcowgirl.com/
    http://silverlakefilmfestival.org/index2.htm
    http://arclightcinemas.com

    reviews:
    filmthreat: http://filmthreat.com/index.php?section=reviews&Id=8198
    variety: http://www.variety.com/review/VE1117929804?categoryid=31&cs=1
    the SF guardian link seems to have disappeared into oblivion

    some of the reviews for this exceedingly weird film have been so good, i've been wondering who's blowing whom for them. not to say that i didn't like the script, cuz obviously i wouldn't have been part of it if i didn't believe in the film and its writer/director, greg hatanaka. but a movie about a meat-inspecting woman (played by the beautiful, sexy, and shorter-younger-version-of-julia-roberts, sarah lassez) who may or may not have mad cow disease who longs for her ex-husband (played by some incredibly fantastic chinese-american actor whose name escapes me at the moment) and sublimates her desire for him into ravenously eating steak dinners and who may or may not be seducing and killing various people including a tv pastor (played by star trek's chekhov--walter koenig), a woman, and her own meat-packing (no pun intended) brother (played by james duvall, who was the giant 6 foot rabbit in Donnie Darko not to be confused with Harvey) is not your typical boy-meets-girl plot.

    film threat said, "Gregory Hatanaka’s Mad Cowgirl represents the most visceral and explosive cinematic mind fuck since Stanley Kubrick tossed Keir Dullea into the psychedelic vortex. Rarely has an experimental film come along like Mad Cowgirl that can take reckless and daring risks and earn a payback on its artistic gambling with a tenfold return. Theaters showing Mad Cowgirl should install seatbelts, because audiences are in for the ultimate wild ride."

    the SF examiner said at the SF film festival, "If there is a winner... it’s undoubtedly Gregory Hatanaka’s Mad Cowgirl. The button-cute Sarah Lassez stars as Therese, a meat inspector during the mad cow disease crisis."

    and the variety review i mentioned in a previous blog said, "there's an impressive weirdness to "Mad Cowgirl" that elevated it above more strained attempts at transgressive cinema at this year's San Francisco Indiefest. Outre tale of a nymphomaniac meat inspector who eventually goes on a murderous delusional rampage ticks off a checklist of offenses -- incest, blasphemy, casting "Star Trek's" erstwhile "Mr. Chekhov" Walter Koenig as a dirty old man, et al. Yet it has the kind of oddball conviction that separates a deserving cult flick from so many aspiring ones."


    i haven't even seen the damn thing yet, so i have no clue what it's gonna be like. should be interesting though.

    i really need to learn how to do a little bit of web page-writing cuz this is all shit i should put on my "what's new" homepage section of my website. dang i'm lazy.
    11:18 pm
    TOO MANY STUPID PEOPLE!!!
    and not enough hammers.

    or mace.

    or gags even.

    but mostly, too many stupid people.

    there are soooo many people i need to say this to right now, but it wouldn't be very polite, so i'll hold off. but man, the world's gonna be different when i become king. you're going to need a basic competency test in order to live anywhere but antarctica. oh wait a second--penguins live in antarctica. i like penguins. never mind, i don't want to mix my favorite animals with my least favorite people. antarctica is off limits to the morons.

    morons can have the north pole. crap--santa and his elves. don't want to sully santa's rep. okay, forget that.

    morons can have the sahara desert. yeah, i don't mind that. wasn't planning on doing much with that anyway. morons--you get the sahara. live it up!
    9:39 pm
    shredding paper is fun!
    i bought a paper shredder for myself. IT'S FUN!!! it can handle staples, and up to 6 sheets at a time, and i like the fact that it's always on, so whenever i feel like shredding something, there it is. put some paper in its mouth, away it goes, and you've got confetti galore at the bottom.

    yeah, i'm easily pleased. never claimed to be anything but.

    however, it's just a matter of time before i start testing it to see what exactly it can shred. 6 sheets of paper, sure. credit card, yeah. toothpicks? yep. what else though? CD's? sandwiches? and if so, just wimpy ones like peanut butter or can it handle the heavy duty ones like roast beef? planks of wood? bricks? acrylic? human flesh and bone?

    the mind boggles at the possibilities.

    and on the subject of shredding shit that's got your address on it to prevent identity theft: OPEN LETTER TO CHARITIES IN GENERAL, BUT ESPECIALLY TO APLA, PLANNED PARENTHOOD, APLA, RED CROSS, APLA, SALVATION ARMY, BUT ESPECIALLY THE FUCKERS AT APLA:

    I donate money to you, in some cases because i think you do good work, in other cases because people i'm close to believe you do good work even if i could give a crap about your organization. do NOT spend all of the money that i donate to you trying to get me to donate more money to you. leave me the fuck alone and i'll probably donate to you again in a year. but when it's freaking march and you're already sending me letters saying, "WE HAVEN'T RECEIVED YOUR RENEWAL CONTRIBUTION FOR 2006 YET! PLEASE DON'T WAIT UNTIL IT'S TOO LATE!" it really makes me want to start an anti-charity designed just to suck off all contributions that would otherwise have gone to you. jeez, you're annoying. especially the fuckers at APLA. hate you guys.
    Thursday, March 16th, 2006
    5:34 pm
    why my niece will be illiterate
    "you see, the fundamental principles of spelling are quite easy. there are five vowels, A, E, I, O, and U along with Y which is sometimes a vowel and sometimes a consonant. All the other letters are consonants and every word has at least one vowel and usually one consonant. The vowels have two main sounds: a long sound which sounds just like they're pronounced, like: Ayyy, Eeeee, Aiiiiii, Ooooooh, youuuuu, and short sounds like aaaaah, ehhh, iiihhhh, ahhhhh, uhhhhh. so when you follow these general rules in spelling, you can't go wrong!"

    --Somebody Who Shall Be Nameless teaching my 4 year-old niece how to spell.

    Her response?
    [pause]
    "Look, I can write upside down!"

    and later to a different person, "you teach me spelling. [The Somebody Who Shall Be Nameless] doesn't do it right."


    she's doomed.
    5:33 pm
    i've always wanted to be a Crazy Genius
    but it seems like the closest i'm ever gonna get is, "eccentric smart guy."

    they're really not the same.
    Wednesday, March 15th, 2006
    3:15 pm
    move to myspace?
    i've been blogging on livejournal for so long, but now i'm seriously considering making the move to myspace. right now, i have a myspace account, but i really don't use it much, and few people seem interested in being my friend. the fact that i have a picture of a llama as my main picture probably turns off the largely anti-llama segment of the myspace population. that tom guy hates llamas, the fucker.

    but everybody's getting on myspace and blogging and leaving cutesy little comments and saying, "thanx for the add!!! ur so HOT!" and stuff. i don't want to be a mindless drone that gets swept along like a lemming spawning upstream with the sheep. but then i remember the wise words of homer simpson from this exchange:

    Bart: But dad, you're giving into mob mentality!
    Homer: No I'm not. I'm hopping on the bandwagon! Now come on son, get with the winning team!!!


    so maybe it's time to join the yankees, root for duke, cheer on microsoft, rent Hertz, and myspace. join the winners!


    urgh. i feel like i need to take a shower now.
    Tuesday, March 7th, 2006
    10:40 pm
    some thoughts
    in no particular order:

    1. note to the Academy: yes, yes, yes, WE GET IT! we should pay $14 per person to watch movies on the big screen in a movie theatre, and we'll really be missing out if we stoop to watching them on television, a portable dvd player, a phone, or psp. we get the message. did you really have to spam us throughout the entire oscar broadcast? really hamhanded and unclassy to throw in self-serving advertisements in during the whole awards ceremony.


    2. i have really been enjoying chewing on toothpicks lately. it helps me to concentrate; it almost feels as if it tames down my ADD. maybe the mindless activity of absently chewing is enough stimulation to provide a pleasant distraction for the electrical storm that normally charges throughout my brain, but is simple enough that it doesn't take my conscious concentration away from whatever task i'm working on. (like blogging right now, f'rinstance).

    interestingly, i wonder if it is addictive. i might have to take up smoking in order to quit chewing toothpicks.

    3. i am fat.

    4. i finally got my name in Variety magazine! http://www.variety.com/review/VE1117929804?categoryid=31&cs=1 this week's issue has a review of an indie film i did, Mad Cowgirl http://madcowgirl.com/ . surprisingly, the two words after my name are not in fact, "sucked ass," but rather "walter koenig." walter koenig is the guy who played chekhov in the original star trek. found it amusing that i'm listed ahead of walter koenig in the credits, but that's what he gets for being a commie. he plays a pastor who gets seduced by the title character. no word yet on whether he calls her "a wessel of God."

    there's more, but i need to study my chinese. and then my lines.

    continued:

    5. Fat vic was at the staples center yesterday watching his beloved stanford cardinal hoop it up in the pac-10 tournament. the staples center is home to some of the best junk food around, especially their hot, juicy pastrami sandwiches with the hand-cooked kettle chips (and they'll throw on extra kettle chips if you ask them nicely). and what did fat vic eat for lunch? a grilled chicken salad and a diet coke. why? because that's what fat people do.

    6. jon stewart was also not nearly as funny, animated, and sarcastic as he is on the daily show. thought he was good, but way more subdued than i've ever seen him. everything i read seems to deride chris rock as being a bad host last year. i didn't think he was bad at all. i was disappointed that he wasn't nearly as scathing as he is when he does standup, but i thought he was very entertaining. plus, his cheshire cat grin always gets me. loved when he interviewed people at the magic johnson theatre and every black person had not seen any of the best picture oscar nominees but all had seen "white chicks." best quote from that bit, "chris you are all up in my space--you gotta back off!"

    7. oh yes, and to top everything off, stanford lost in the pac-10 tournament to arizona, thereby insuring that for the first time in 11 years, we will not be going to the ncaa tournament. sigh.

    8. "10:15" sounds a lot like "2:15" when you hear it on the phone. unfortunately, the two are significantly different when you show up for your 10:15 audition at uhh, 2:15. crap.

    there's more but hell if i can remember any of it now. that's because i'm old. and fat.
    8:59 pm
    signs that you're getting fat...
    1. on friday, your ex-girlfriend sees you, and she takes two fingers and gently taps the area of your neck just behind your chin.

    2. on monday, you go to the chinatown merchant that you buy all your baby clothes from for the children of all your very fertile and married friends, and she greets you with a broad smile and the question, "how many pounds did you gain since last time?"

    3. earlier in the week, you had 10 ice cream bars in a 24 hour period.


    okay, i'm getting fat. time to start exercising more and eating less. a shame. i think i enjoy the converse of that directive a lot better.

    fat vic. metabolism slowing down. another sign, along with back problems and more gray hairs that i'm getting old. can't wait for the erectile dysfunction to kick in...
    Monday, March 6th, 2006
    1:56 pm
    my niece's voicemail
    "jo jo i had a snowball from outside......i played with it"

    i love that message. saved it and listen to it periodically and it always makes me smile.
    Thursday, March 2nd, 2006
    5:28 am
    Tuesday, February 28th, 2006
    6:39 pm
    i like hiccups!
    was walking on the street with my friend today and experienced one of those ridiculously loud hiccups that i sometimes get, and i remembered how much i enjoy having the hiccups. since hiccups are a spasm of your diaphragm, i figure a powerful hiccup is equal to a quarter of a situp. so a good bout of hiccups might be equal to 25 sit-ups or something. that's good exercise for something you're not even trying to do.

    along those lines, maybe an epileptic seizure would be even better--kind of like a full body workout all at once. come to think of it, i think i'll hold off on trying one of those.
    Monday, February 27th, 2006
    1:17 pm
    competitions that i want to participate in before i die
    Lithuania: Toilet Racing. teams of 5 people (one inside) compete simultaneously to push a port-a-potty around a snow-covered 100m track

    Finland: Wife-Carrying World Championships. the winning couple gets the wife's weight in beer. Estonians have historically dominated this competition, which i'm sure pisses off the finlanders. well, screw you finlanders--get some lighter wives and stronger husbands and stop your kvetching. (note: helsinki is also the home of the annual World Air Guitar Championships. man, those finlanders have all the fun competitions)

    Scotland: caber-tossing. i've never enjoyed telephone poles more than when i was throwing them end-over-end, so i should do this competitively.

    USA: espn2 world's strongest man competition. i'm a pretty big fan of Carrying Africa (contestants have to walk as far as they can while carrying a mega-heavy sculpture of Africa), and the Keg Toss (contestants have to throw full beer kegs over a high wall, and run like hell if the keg doesn't quite clear).

    England: Cooper's Hill Cheese Roll. Contestants line up at the top of a humongous, ridiculously steep hill. a 7-pound cheese wheel is released down the hill, and everybody takes off in hot pursuit. it's absolutely insane, and they keep ambulances and medical professionals sattioned at the bottom of the hill for all the inevitable injuries. apparently, large people are also employed as "catchers" at the bottom of the hill for participants who are still tumbling out of control. and yes, the winner gets to keep the cheese. there's some dude who's the wayne gretzky of cheese rolling, having won 21 cheeses in 14 years. damn.

    China: 2008 Olympic 100m dash finals. this may still happen. i never give up on my dreams. just waiting for that six-million dollar man bionic legs thing to be perfected.

    there are also festivals that i want to participate in. that's a blog for another day. but ones that loom large are: the big annual town-wide tomato fight, the big annual town-wide orange fight, and la corrida de toros. interestingly, all three are in spain. man, those spaniards have the coolest festivals!
    Thursday, February 23rd, 2006
    6:26 pm
    shitty scripts
    how is it that so many people who can NOT write are able to do so for 100 pages?
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